people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
