You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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