I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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