Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Randomize
