the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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