I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
