after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
