he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
