we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
