Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
