In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
