"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
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I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
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I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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