neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
