New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
