I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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