I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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