he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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