Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  dude you need to get laid

  (906): View more from Michigan

  me?

  (616): View more from Michigan

  no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months

  (906): View more from Michigan

  oh I thought you were talkin about me

  (906): View more from Michigan

  wait

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): dude you need to get laid (906): me? (616): no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months (906): oh I thought you were talkin about me (906): wait http://tfl.nu/self
  Replies (10) Good night (1408) Bad night (2150)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill. http://tfl.nu/xwdt
  Replies (3) Good night (1356) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial http://tfl.nu/135m
  Replies (7) Good night (1423) Bad night (1023)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely http://tfl.nu/75r5
  Replies (8) Good night (4106) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  He is an equal opportunity slut.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): He is an equal opportunity slut. http://tfl.nu/40gq
  Replies (10) Good night (2577) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college. http://tfl.nu/j0w5
  Replies (58) Good night (6455) Bad night (877)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre http://tfl.nu/3hgx
  Replies (20) Good night (7210) Bad night (1702)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished. http://tfl.nu/vhfi
  Replies (4) Good night (3644) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom. http://tfl.nu/hw22
  Replies (13) Good night (5785) Bad night (1245)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window. http://tfl.nu/kuhj
  Replies (6) Good night (1144) Bad night (3008)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night. http://tfl.nu/pbft
  Replies (12) Good night (1145) Bad night (7993)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed http://tfl.nu/t2n3
  Replies (15) Good night (2976) Bad night (1710)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor. http://tfl.nu/v2bs
  Replies (7) Good night (1725) Bad night (861)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us http://tfl.nu/pmf4
  Replies (8) Good night (3907) Bad night (730)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting. http://tfl.nu/4wbm
  Replies (12) Good night (329) Bad night (875)

Randomize