make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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