In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
