i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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