so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
