so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Randomize
