love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
