doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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