VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
