do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
