i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
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