I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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