God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
