I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
