yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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