Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
