I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
