There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
