i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
