I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
