my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
