I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I know her cup size but not her name....
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize