so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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