matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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