If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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