one two three fourrrrnication!
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize