I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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