He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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