never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
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just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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