idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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