how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.