school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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