A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i wish my penis had a tongue
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
