Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.